Whether you get into relationships easily, or you had to scratch and claw through rejections to land a girlfriend, it's not cool if she's cheating (especially if you're being loyal).
Before we get into the signs that she's cheating, let's first call attention to the number one reason women might cheat: you drive them to it. In other words, you're so insecure that you constantly accuse her of cheating or you act suspicious (in other words, you're telling her through words or actions that you're not worthy of her). Bad move. If she is already catching grief for cheating she's not doing, then she might as well catch grief for cheating she is doing. Obviously, if she is cheating, it creates an incentive to dump you, which is another reason you don't want to push her into cheating by acting insecure.
That said, how do you tell if she's cheating, especially if you didn't accuse her of it in the first place? Here's the best way to tell that anyone is doing something dishonest:
A CHANGE IN THEIR BEHAVIOR.
If nothing has changed, then you have no signs. Here are some of the signs. Feel free to comment with your own:
1. She keeps talking about some other guy(s). He could be an ex, a co-worker, whatever. If he's not her blood relative or some famous figure from history long dead, it means she's cheating with him, about to cheat with him, or planning whom she will be with when she dumps you very shortly.
2. Equally common is that she is less available to see you. When she likes you, she wants to see you as much as possible. Sometimes this is annoying (if work is hectic, etc.), but this is a sign that your relationship is doing well. A girlfriend who wants to see you all the time wouldn't do that if she were cheating.
3. She has lost interest in sex partially or completely. This is a no-brainer. She is exhausted both physically as well as mentally (it is hard work and very stressful to hide it from you).
4. She is lying to you about something. Once someone tells a lie, they have to tell other lies to cover for those lies. This is hilarious when it happens in movies. Less so when it happens to you.
5. She starts accusing you of cheating on her! People are often intolerant or suspicious of others for that which makes them ashamed of themselves. Dishonest people are paranoid.
6. She cannot, or does not account for her time. You should not be making her account for her time. But if she is cheating, she is less likely to share details of her day with you.
7. Semi-obvious clues like her getting nervous when she gets certain calls or texts.
8. Completely obvious clues like some other guy's clothing in her apartment. Or photographs on her night table, computer desktop image, new facebook friend and lots of messages back and forth. Or she might mention it on a friend's facebook page, not realizing that you're on it, too.
9. She hesitates to make medium-range plans with you, like a weekend trip with you for a holiday two months away. She's going with someone else, or dumping you before then.
10. She is not available at times of the week she usually was. Did she want to always see you on Friday, Saturday or Tuesday nights? Unless she's taking a class that night this semester, it means she's getting schooled by some guy.
I don't mention her telling you she needs her space, a timeout from the relationship, or she wants to move out if she's living with you, as signs she's been cheating. My reason is that it's irrelevant if she was cheating. The relationship is over, except for a few long telephone conversations where you beg her to take you back. Don't be that guy.
So there you have it. Ten signs your girlfriend is cheating, so you stop getting played! Post any feedback you may have here, especially your own signs.
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