Diamondog's Blog

Diamondog, every time I see a girl I wonder what to do for so long, that I usually miss the opportunity. What advice do you have for me when I go out? I'm so embarrassed.

Good question. Actually, you have nothing to be embarrassed by. You have the exact same problem as many of the best guys in the world: not feeling immediately social. So here are my 7 tips on how to attract a girl:

1. Recognize that just about every guy needs time to get warmed up. Therefore, you should
go out earlier than shortly before the bars close. During daygame, you should also give yourself time to warm up. It is very unusual to just be able to flip a switch and become charismatic. Some guys use alcohol, but that's a crutch, and may just make them tired and apathetic.

2. Warm up quickly by not trying to pick up: just say hello, make toasts, high fives to both girls and mixed groups of girls and guys. No one will reject this. This shouldn't take too long. And of course you can re-approach.

3. Remember when FDR (President Franklin Delano Roosevelt to those of you outside the US) said
“the only thing we have to fear is fear itself”, he was talking about both the Great Depression and pick-up. He meant that worse than being afraid is being afraid of being afraid, over-analyzing being afraid and criticizing yourself over being afraid keeps you stuck.  He's pictured on a dime.

4. Learn about opening and maintaining a conversation. Here's a link to one from me:


5. Remember that your best nights out can start out poorly. You can start stifled, barely even able to say hello, and have it turn out great! Makeouts with three girls (at once!), phone numbers from girls who answer your text, finger-blasting two girls, and even pulling (a description of me at a festival yesterday, when I was on, and moving on quickly from interactions that were going nowhere). Amazingly, I started out thinking that I wasted my time showing up.

This guy has a great image for when he rubs one out later.  wink

6. Have a wingman who inspires you. For example, I've gone out with a wingman who had two girls in a row invite him over for booty calls in the middle of the night, and then refuse to open the door. He has more courage than Rocky, and laughs at himself better than Rod Stewart.

7. If you have no one to go out with, just tell girls that your friend is over there somewhere. Like any test she throws at you, it's not so much the answer as it is your non-reactiveness to it. You could have the best answer ever. But if you appear to be in pain, then it's game over.

So there you have it. Seven tips on how to attract a girl, so you don't miss the opportunity. Post any feedback you may have here, and how you used these ideas in Field Reports.
Login or register to post.

Related Posts