Diamondog's Blog

Hello Diamondog, I've been going out more and more, plus writing to girls online. I've been getting girls to talk to me, which I've never done before. But I've been having trouble getting phone numbers. What should I do?

She'll decline the charge if you call her collect.

I'm glad to see you're making progress. The most basic thing to understand about the number is that
it's no big deal to ask for it, and to get it. That means that many girls will give out the number, but flake when it comes time to see you again, even if your phone/text game is good. For that reason,
you'll want many numbers, not just one. If you only have one number at a time, it will be a long time between dates.

So here are the 7 tips to get girls' phone numbers:

1. First of all, you will need to ask for it. It is very unusual that she will take the initiative to offer you her number, or a business card with it printed, no matter how well the interaction is going. It has happened to me on rare occasions, but didn't mean that the girl was much more interested in me than someone who gave me her number after I asked. If you can't ask for the number, she'll think you have no confidence, which is bad.

2. Since it's no big deal, don't make it a big deal. Try to talk to her for a while (every interaction is different, so I can't tell you how long), and then go for the number on a high point of the conversation. The worst way to get a number is to apologize for it, “I know we don't know each other...blah blah blah”. Act like you've gotten numbers before. It's no big deal.

3. Here's how to number-close: “Hey, let me put your number in my phone.” This works well if you've made tentative plans to meet again for some event. Obviously you can meet up again before that.

4. She probably won't ask why you want the number, as that would make her look like she's a hermit who never gets approached. But if she does, don't flinch. Just say, “To keep in touch until next time. I'll put it into my phone.”

5. If she hems and haws, asks for your number, don't get mad. Just don't expect the number to amount to anything if she hesitates before giving it. But you've got other numbers as well. Better than an email is a first and last name to friend her on Facebook, and continue the interaction over email.

6. Once I get the number, I text her something quick while standing next to her, along the lines of “Hey [her name], get home safe! - [my name]”. You could write something like, “Don't forget me, and I won't forget you”, but that would take more time and you'd be standing there awkwardly, unless she needs to leave as she gives you the number. After I get the number, I continue the conversation as long as possible, as opposed to getting the number and running away. You'll already with her.

7. A final note about trying to bring her home: I'll go for the number even if I think I'll be staying in set for much longer because it has potential. I'll go for the number, “just in case we get separated.” You'd be surprised how often this could happen, especially if she's in a group, or the place is crowded.

I only have room in my phone for one more number.  Who will it be?

So there you have it. Seven tips for getting girls' phone numbers, to fill your calendar full of fun. Post any feedback you may have here, and on RSDnation.
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