So Diamondog, how do I know if someone likes me, before and after I approach her?
Good question. When you believe you are attractive, it activates your Reticular Activation System, so you start noticing indicators of interest. Even if you are not that attracted to her, you might as well strike up a conversation as a warm-up set, like stretching and warming up in the gym.
With that said, there are a few ways of telling if a woman likes you before you approach. If you are super-new to game, I would recommend going for these ones first:
1. Girls who seem to be checking you out. They may turn to look at you, look away, turn to look at you again, etc. Go approach her.
2. Girls who smile at you, whether they stand still or even if they keep walking.
3. Girls who introduce themselves to you, and ask your name. Girls don't usually try to pick up guys. So if she opens you, it will be something low-key and not especially daring, like asking your name. This doesn't mean you're home free to extract her. Not by any means. But she will be more open to the conversation.
These things happen, but are actually pretty rare. And they might not even be the girls to whom you are most attracted. So be it. I would warn you that if you rely only on these three signs above, you will have lots of excuses not to approach. So you should approach whether you get these signs or not. Now, once you approach, here are 7 signs it is going well and she likes you:
4. She holds eye contact and faces towards you.
5. She responds to questions with more than one word answers and asks you questions. However, you must not expect this in the beginning, or you will blow yourself out of perfectly good sets. This should happen after some time. You must get comfortable talking at length. An exercise from improv might help: begin each sentence with the last letter of the last word of the last sentence.
6. She avoids leaving with her friends when they arrive. This happens only sometimes, and is a great sign. Otherwise, you must introduce yourself to her friends and tag along, if they are going to another part of the bar, another bar, to eat, etc.
7. She introduces you to her group. Great if it happens. Usually you must make the effort to introduce yourself. Remember her name! If it is loud, ask her to spell it, and then repeat it back to her.
8. She gives you her number without hesitation, after I say something simple like, “I'll take down your number in case we get separated.” Then I text her saying something simple like “[Her name], so pleased to meet you – [my name]”.
9. If you leave separately at the end of the night, she should respond to your texts. I'll probably write a blog entry soon about texting and sexting.
10. If you ask her out for a specific night, time and location, she says yes and shows up. This is huge. And if she can't make it, she might suggest an alternative time and date. But don't count on it. Without skipping a beat, ask her when might be a better time, because you don't know how much longer you can hold your breath. If it's not until she gets back into town next Monday, don't act butt-hurt that she's avoiding you. Chodes do that. Tell her you hope she has a great trip and that you'll be in touch. It shows your non-neediness. Of course you have other numbers because you've been going out, and you know not to put all your eggs in one basket.
So there you have it. Ten signs a woman likes you, so you focus on the warmest prospects. Post any feedback you may have here, and in your own Field Reports.
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