Brad Branson

Brad
 
I’m in the middle of some intense video editing, and thought I’d throw in this week’s video clip as well.

The end product is me chilling in downtown Chicago at the zoo with a SERIOUS faux hawk provided by the wind city.

So faux hawk aside, I wanted to breakdown the process of how to end bad emotions, in a way that makes you more aware of your life goals, and how to make decisions in the future based off of those life values/goals.

Check out the vid and see what I mean, Kablam!


Do Not Suppress!

The way that most people deal with their emotions is by holding them in, bottling them up.

Their girlfriend pisses them off, and instead of either calling her out in a constructive way, or changing their perspective of her actions, they bottle up the emotions, and start harboring bad anchors towards her.

“Why is she always like that?! It’s so damn annoying!”

They put up with the bullshit, and months or YEARS later, it culminates in an explosive freak out session.

That’s not good, m’kay?

What you want to do is TRANSCEND your emotions, not suppress them.

On the surface it looks like the same thing, but there is a drastically different process going on underneath.

As I’ve said many times, negative emotions are indicators that your life situation is in dissonance to your beliefs, and you can use these bad emotions as signals for change.

Back to the example of the bitchy girlfriend, when you start getting angry, what is the next step?

Not to hold in your angst, not to rationalize to yourself that you deserve the abuse, it’s to take action and tell her what’s up, or go find a new girlfriend.

But is action always the right answer?

Sometimes it might be you have a skewed view of the situation.

Again, in the case of relationships, communication is SO helpful here, because it’s hard to always be empathizing with the other person.

No matter how annoying and evil a person is, I think everyone deep down has good intentions. Maybe she’s worried about you leaving her, and because you always go out and party, she needs some affirmation you’re not going to leave her.

Maybe you are slacking off at work, and she’s worried about your long term goals.

I love how David Deida explains how your women is a mirror of your own life. If she isn’t happy, it’s probably because you aren’t living up to your full potential, whether that be at work, with your family, or with yourself.

By bringing the annoying behaviors into an open communication, you might find out WHY she’s doing what she is doing, and once your perspective shifts, the emotional energy fades.

Your Relationship with Yourself

But this post isn’t about relationships, well I guess it is, but also with YOURSELF.

When those negative emotions bubble up, look at how you are perceiving the situation. Look at what is under your control.

Can you change the situation? Can you change your path and start moving towards that at least?

Or is your thought process wrong, and you are stressing about something that isn’t even a big deal?

Use the techniques I mentioned in the article about extending the timeline, and aligning your decisions with your life goals.

Move to a higher perspective, step out of the emotion and see why it’s there, and what is the best way to move forward.

Look at your long term life values, and WHY you feel how you do, and how it correlates to those values.

In the process you will not only transcend the emotion, you’ll reaffirm your life values, making them clearer and more attainable.

---

Damn Chicago was fun last week. I hit a new low. High? Pulled some 85lb. 4’10” yoga instructor on Saturday night. Lots of fun.

Yet, as I mentioned in the video, I did notice my chops are a little rusty, and with the Vegas Summit coming up, I gotta get on my shit.

I’m finishing up the new project I’ve been working on, we’re calling it Evolutions, more on that in a few weeks, but now I’ve got the free time to hit the clubs hard again.

Need to get out every night, not gonna happen in Milwaukee. Hahaha. Looks like I’m going to start spending more time in New York until Vegas…

I’ll see you on the dancefloor.
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Comments

#1
machine81

machine81

Junior Member

Join Date: 06/17/2012 | Posts: 13

 First on brads post - can't complain
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#2

SEAN PUA

Member

Join Date: 11/08/2010 | Posts: 84

 LOVE Re-Framing... Sometimes when I am trying to rationalize not going out I think of something one of my Afgan friends told me... In Afganistan dudes draw naked pictures of girls in the sand and jack off to them LMFAO!!!!!!!  It's sad and true and fucken hellllllllllllllarious! And as soon as I think of, GOD FORBIT what if I was in that situation, it puts me in the Go For It frame and even if I am feeling like crap if I made plans I'll still go out and appreciate it... 
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#3

Magnificent

Junior Member

Join Date: 09/22/2010 | Posts: 4

Hey Brad - Thanks for all your wonderful posts!

I'd like to have your perspective on a situation I'm currently deadling with if you may.

After reading your article called, "Peak and Valleys: What Creates Plateaus and Paradigm Shifts in your Game," I found myself falling into the plateau trap. It's something that I am facing right now.

In the past, I had no AA(perhaps I didn't care). Now it's always crossing my mind whenever I approach, causing me to wimp out and not be able to holding a group's attention naturally/confidently with them for a good amount of time. I use to be more fun, expressive, and outcome independent. Now it's dissipating.

It's almost as if my mindset and the way I see things has been shifting into retreat - sheltering myself from making mistakes or getting rejected. It's like an ego thing... the "idea" of not trying to fuck up, because If I do, it'll be something EXTREMELY bad. What kind of crap is "generalizing/concluding" about a situation before it even occurs?

As of now, I'm trying to overcome this sticking point. I know what you said, "to smash the image you’ve created for yourself, go out and mess up a few approaches, become the newb again, and just make it fun, not giving a fuck about the outcome." This really seems easier said than done, but I suppose it truly is about the ego and destroying it.

I guess, there really is no escape except to face it head on. Now that it makes so much more sense just typing it all up, I don't even know why I'm asking you for your advice still...

Anyhow, hearing back from you about this is better than nothing!

Let me know your thoughts Brad,

Magnificent,

Thank you...
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#4

Magnificent

Junior Member

Join Date: 09/22/2010 | Posts: 4

I love your vid, it's extremely valuable.

This is really something we should all do to prep ourselves up before facing a situation we may not be comfortable with. I really love the self-doubt (reframe) to extreme self-love idea. It's brilliant ;)

I guess when it truly comes down to it, it's the intrepretation of situations we face that concludes what we allow as thoughts, good or bad, which becomes our beliefs overtime. Befriend your emotions!

You've really defined how emotions can take over our lives, and how to deal with it effectively...

Thanks brad ;)

Magnificent
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#5
MULDER

MULDER

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Join Date: 05/24/2012 | Posts: 6

 Great that you shared that experience and the reframing you did to get in the right head space to take action.
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#6
Ryan

Ryan

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Join Date: 11/13/2011 | Posts: 938

fuckin plant
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#7
Robert Paulsen

Robert Paulsen

Member

Join Date: 05/25/2012 | Posts: 41

Trancend the bad emotions lol... only through the power of Now.
Re-framing is great for bringing out the inner humble narcissicm which is dope.
Good job brad
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#8
Icy

Icy

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/29/2012 | Posts: 181

Why did your girl get mad about the blog Brad?
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#9
Nerdsaver

Nerdsaver

Senior Member

Join Date: 10/15/2011 | Posts: 144

 This is exactly what I needed right now with my current relationships. Read my mind, thanks Brad. 
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#10
Prince~

Prince~

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Join Date: 10/26/2010 | Posts: 138

Yeah man I realised that getting in a relationship less than a year after my bootcamp caused major dissonance for me, it just didn't match up. Your girl knows your not fully committed and more importantly YOU KNOW.

Just listened to your  mastermind with Saad that went a little bit into this and it helped me with it.
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#11

NYtitsjunkie

Member

Join Date: 07/18/2012 | Posts: 38

 hey Brad. I am in NY. lets hang out
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#12

Free style

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Join Date: 07/21/2012 | Posts: 588

Dude, Milwaukee is awesome...
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#13

G Bizz

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Join Date: 01/17/2010 | Posts: 525

Dude, (ho homo), but I want your arms 0.0
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#14
Kool Kane

Kool Kane

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/03/2010 | Posts: 169

Lol, how you always end up in a sweltry forest. Sweating and fighting against bloodsucking animuhs like mosquitos. RSD Brad Grylls edition^^

I think you write pretty decent posts. One that I really, really liked was the one on which you talk about the different layers of truth and being real. Were you rate being direct from 1 to 10. I think that was amazing. A lot of people especially in this community think pretty black & white in the terms of being direct/indirect. I think it's a little more complex than that and your post nailed it. You might consider to make a renewed v-blog about this topic and maybe a couple of other classic posts of yours. V-blogs are more likley to be seen as opposed to every written peace get read.
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#15
Dawinci

Dawinci

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Join Date: 04/08/2012 | Posts: 30

 GREEEEEEAAAAAAAAAT, gladiator and meditator in the same form, love! Take this with me, thaaaaank you! Boom
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#16
Mountaineer-~

Mountaineer-~

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Join Date: 01/07/2011 | Posts: 360

good distinction!
your video editing skills are getting better and better dude!
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#17
Buii

Buii

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Join Date: 07/31/2008 | Posts: 136

Your puplic speaking is awesome!
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#18

Ocean2

Respected Member

Join Date: 07/18/2011 | Posts: 699

 Man, that "zooming" out is helping me a lot, THANKS!
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#19
Raga-Tanha

Raga-Tanha

Junior Member

Join Date: 07/15/2012 | Posts: 16

Good post,

I've noticed just taking action and approaching burns off many of my issues with negative thougt loops. Though my problem is a lack of positive expectation. I will try this though.
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#20

cazador

Member

Join Date: 10/09/2010 | Posts: 66

Thanks for the thoughts, Brad.

I don't remember this quote from Deida or perhaps the context is not accurate; in my experience, a man has to make A LOT of mental room for his woman being "not happy" and bitchy. "Unhappy" is what a woman does periodically. I've been laser-focused on my goals (living my purpose) and in the last few weeks finally reaping some major results, which set my girlfriend off bitching, likely unconsciously, about everything - it was so insane I almost broke up with her. That seemed to reset her mind since she knows I don't fuck around with nonsense.

What Deida does say is that when a woman sees you in your purpose she'd try to knock you off it to test your mettle. He gives the example of a soldier going to war; his woman says "don't go" but really, deep down, she expects her man to go. If he stays like she "wants" him to she'd end up losing respect for him.

My two cents on Deida. Keep the articles coming!

(BTW, I started using some of the supplements you mentioned in a previous blog).
Brad- wrote:
I love how David Deida explains how your women is a mirror of your own life. If she isn’t happy, it’s probably because you aren’t living up to your full potential, whether that be at work, with your family, or with yourself.

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#21

champ

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/19/2011 | Posts: 850

Nice article. I dont know about other people but for me it took a while (like  a couple a weeks) for the reframing techniques from some of your previous articles to become effective in "trancending". They were in part helpful in "transcending" and overcoming some things. So I would suggest for people to stick at it even when they dont get that immediate "transcendence". Cool vid as well. Stay up sir!.
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#22
Gift~

Gift~

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/02/2010 | Posts: 160

This whole "Dude (no homo)" thing, is actually FUCKING GAY.

If you like something about a brotha, just fucking tell him.

And OWN IT, like a man.

Like this:

"Brad, you're fucking ripped, bro! How did you get to be so fucking ripped?"

See? Easy.

My Gift~ to you.
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#23
undercard

undercard

Senior Member

Join Date: 05/03/2011 | Posts: 161

makes me wonder...Someone could choose to be a real bad ass motherfucker who kills and rapes people

But if applies the principles spoken in this video he/she could push past the guilt through being present and transcending emotions...like if brad hit a little child by accident instead of a dear he could then say to himself in 500 years will this really matter
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#24
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Yes, the stems of this are for me at least very nihilistic.  It's all one and the same, we're all going to die, and therefore nothing has any meaning to it other than the arbitrary meaning you or society puts on something.

Change that meaning.
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#25
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Magnificent wrote:
Hey Brad - Thanks for all your wonderful posts!

I'd like to have your perspective on a situation I'm currently deadling with if you may.

After reading your article called, "Peak and Valleys: What Creates Plateaus and Paradigm Shifts in your Game," I found myself falling into the plateau trap. It's something that I am facing right now.

In the past, I had no AA(perhaps I didn't care). Now it's always crossing my mind whenever I approach, causing me to wimp out and not be able to holding a group's attention naturally/confidently with them for a good amount of time. I use to be more fun, expressive, and outcome independent. Now it's dissipating.

It's almost as if my mindset and the way I see things has been shifting into retreat - sheltering myself from making mistakes or getting rejected. It's like an ego thing... the "idea" of not trying to fuck up, because If I do, it'll be something EXTREMELY bad. What kind of crap is "generalizing/concluding" about a situation before it even occurs?

As of now, I'm trying to overcome this sticking point. I know what you said, "to smash the image you’ve created for yourself, go out and mess up a few approaches, become the newb again, and just make it fun, not giving a fuck about the outcome." This really seems easier said than done, but I suppose it truly is about the ego and destroying it.

I guess, there really is no escape except to face it head on. Now that it makes so much more sense just typing it all up, I don't even know why I'm asking you for your advice still...

Anyhow, hearing back from you about this is better than nothing!

Let me know your thoughts Brad,

Magnificent,

Thank you...
You gotta step up and deal with it. Did you watch Tyler's recent vid about dealing with shit and moving on? It is intense but motivating as hell ;)
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#26
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Magnificent wrote:
I love your vid, it's extremely valuable.

This is really something we should all do to prep ourselves up before facing a situation we may not be comfortable with. I really love the self-doubt (reframe) to extreme self-love idea. It's brilliant ;)

I guess when it truly comes down to it, it's the intrepretation of situations we face that concludes what we allow as thoughts, good or bad, which becomes our beliefs overtime. Befriend your emotions!

You've really defined how emotions can take over our lives, and how to deal with it effectively...

Thanks brad ;)

Magnificent
Thanks :)
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#27
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Prince~ wrote:
Yeah man I realised that getting in a relationship less than a year after my bootcamp caused major dissonance for me, it just didn't match up. Your girl knows your not fully committed and more importantly YOU KNOW.

Just listened to your  mastermind with Saad that went a little bit into this and it helped me with it.
hah this happens to so many students after bootcamp -- no relationships for at least a year! lol
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#28
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Kool Kane wrote:
Lol, how you always end up in a sweltry forest. Sweating and fighting against bloodsucking animuhs like mosquitos. RSD Brad Grylls edition^^

I think you write pretty decent posts. One that I really, really liked was the one on which you talk about the different layers of truth and being real. Were you rate being direct from 1 to 10. I think that was amazing. A lot of people especially in this community think pretty black & white in the terms of being direct/indirect. I think it's a little more complex than that and your post nailed it. You might consider to make a renewed v-blog about this topic and maybe a couple of other classic posts of yours. V-blogs are more likley to be seen as opposed to every written peace get read.
Thanks for the feedback 
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#29
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Mountaineer- wrote:
good distinction!
your video editing skills are getting better and better dude!
From all the editing for my new product ;)
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#30
Brad

Brad

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Gift~ wrote:
This whole "Dude (no homo)" thing, is actually FUCKING GAY.

If you like something about a brotha, just fucking tell him.

And OWN IT, like a man.

Like this:

"Brad, you're fucking ripped, bro! How did you get to be so fucking ripped?"

See? Easy.

My Gift~ to you.
lol
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#31

Zynergy

Junior Member

Join Date: 07/27/2011 | Posts: 20

Dude greaaat article.  This one and the last several on the main page have come at the exact right time for me becuase I've been battling a minor case of one-itis.  That shit is like herpes, there is no safe amount to have.
Specifically what you said about dissonance in your life showing up as negative or misplaced emotions elsewhere was dead on for me.  I think ultimately being pissed about my job and not having a full abundance of dateable girls around is fucking me up and I was subconsciously trying to draw happiness from this girl.  No bueno.  After sorting it out I feel back on track with a solid game plan, so thx for the oneitis-herpes remedy Doc B!  
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#32
hendricks

hendricks

Junior Member

Join Date: 08/13/2012 | Posts: 3

Nice video
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#33
krispy08

krispy08

Junior Member

Join Date: 01/27/2011 | Posts: 13

Yo Brad, what's so bad about going out in Milwaukee?! Haha nah I'm just playin...it's my hometown as well. Being a 20yr old UW Madison student I don't have the ability to spend much time partying over in Mil, so I guess I couldn't really tell ya much about it. Anyways, have fun at the Summit - sounds kickass! 

Btw, you're lookin pretty jacked man (no homo). I had been hitting the gym a decent amount when I was back at school but been on and off with it this summer. I'm curious as to what information/articles regarding health and nutrition that you found really stood out to you?


Thanks bud!
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