BKW's Blog

How do you get into meeting women when you're completely out of it? How do you expect to go from no motivation to motivation to focus and to success? A lot of it comes from knowing what it takes to gain that motivation and drive and focus.

Recently I've discovered a good way to gain motivation to meet women when I have no motivation. There are two ways off the top of my mind:

1. Meditation
2. Putting yourself in the situation

Meditation is basically sitting down somewhere quite and relaxing and just thinking about what it is you want and how you are going to get it. When you meditate you're essentially prepping your mind for the activity you want to pursue. If anything, meeting women is mainly what they call "inner game" (aka being in tune within yourself). If your inner-self isn't prepared then you are going to have a very difficult time meeting women. Once again, meditation helps you ground yourself, and it helps especially if you haven't been out meeting women lately. When you meditate you can sit down and just rehash things in your mind and rediscover what it is you want to do and how you are going to make it happen, or you can jot down notes and do it that way--I often do the notes. Anything that involves grounding the inner-you, whether it be motivation through books, audio, blogs, etc., is meditation. The desired effect is that you are grounded and centered and mentally prepped for what you want to do.

Another good way is putting yourself in the situation. By putting yourself in the situation of meeting girls when you're not motivated, you will essentially be forcing yourself to focus on what it is you need to do to meet women. For example, let's say you aren't motivated so you go out to a bar to get motivated to meet girls. When you arrive unmotivated or not focused, your brain will be asking you why you are there in the first place; what is it you want to accomplish; there is a pretty girl over there, how can I approach, etc. By putting yourself int he situation and forcing yourself to observe what it is you really want it will help identify what it is you need to do to accomplish meeting girls. Use that experience of going out when you're not motivated and meditate on that experience of how you felt to put you back on track of motivation and focus for the next time you go out.

Once again, these things are good when you are NOT motivated, and they will help you gain motivation and focus. When you've been out of it for a while, you need to prep yourself all over again from scratch--it is an ongoing progression that needs to be honed. The more you are actively meeting women, the less you will need to hone yourself. Likewise, the less you are meeting women, the more you will likely have to hone yourself.
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Junior Member

Join Date: 01/19/2012 | Posts: 14

Nice post. When i meditate I just try and shut off all thought and be present to the moment and focus on breathing.

Good to see theres other ways of doing things
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