Behzad's Blog

 Tonight was the night. I was totally independent of outcome and i felt like a fuckin natural. No approach anxiety on the dancfloor whatsoever. Well my game is only based on the dance floor right now and ima also try gaming while being off the dance floor. During tonight and even today I didnt give a fuck whatsoever about what anyone in the fuckin galaxy thought of me. Im doing what i want. i do what I value. So i just dont give a shit. How simple is that? I enjoy the process of whatever im doing thanks to Ozzy's article and i love living life! Cause im doing whatever i want! Even on the course of today i saw many girls catching my eye and staring at me in some way. It was like they felt the energy. How do I never lose the energy? I simply dont resist any emotions whatsoever like Tyler said. This means that I accept every emotion that comes my way and say that "its alright" and live with it. Cause its the emotions that we live for is it not? 

I approached every set on the dance floor tonight. I almost got a 10. But her friend wasnt ok so they left. I felt like I deserved her. I felt like I was the SHIT. I almost got a 9. But I left when she said she didnt wana dance with me even though she had danced with me a bit. Whatever. All my problems seem to be in my "outer game". Maybe it was something I said or did that made her uncomfortable. I made out with a 7 for a straight 2 minutes. She did that so that I would buy her a drink. Which I did. Like Jeff says: "nth is for free." But when I bought the drink she went with this other guy. Whatever. The makeout was hilarious. She was really good at it. I approached this other 7ish on the dance-floor. She also could be a 6. But she didnt look bad and was kinda cute and that was good enough for me. I made out with her after the first 20 seconds. She left when I licked her neck. I guess she didnt like it. I danced with this other girl AGAIN cause I had already dance with her and she had "kinda" rejected me. She seemed into me so that didnt matter no more. I left her when she did another "rejection" and went to this 8 girl who I had already danced with........

I hadnt gone very physical with her and I kinda gave her a "one second make out" (more like a skimo kiss) and right then she backed off and was like "did u just let urself do that?" Hell yah! So I had left her after she said that it was her sister's birthday and that they had agreed to not include any guys. I did the number close before I leave though.  So now I was approaching her again when I saw that they had broken their rule and were dancing with some guys.  She wasnt dancing with anyone so I went right in. I shouldnt have given into the "no guys rule" anyhow. Well when girls kinda ask me to leave I kinda feel like a to stay there. I think that seems really needy. 
So I started dancing with her and after a while we went off the dancefloor cause it was too hot for her. She was like "Im so hot right now." Then I went "Ur really good at compimenting urself" and she laughed. I show her that I had already texted her number and that i had gotten a message saying that the phone was off or sth like that. Then she freaked out and tried to explain how she did the number wrong and how that was actually her sister's number. I didnt belive her but I simply gave her a hug and said that it was ok. I also told her  not to freak out and that I didnt like it when girls freaked out. Maybe I shouldnt have said that. But I was like whatever. Whats done is done right?

Near the end when im about to makeout with her she goes "Im sorry" and tells me that the last guy she had had a first date makeout with had totaly creeped her out. I say its ok and that I dont really think that its really that important to makeout. And I cut her off when she trys to explain again why she doesnt feel good that way and tell her that "Im serious. I dont really care." I went really physical. But I did not touch the "three hot spots". I didnt wana freak her out. After all if ur a girl I know that its kinda embarresing to have a guy touching u like that in front of everybody. And after that I leave her with giving her a hug. Totaly respecting the way she felt about the "first date makeout". What should I say? I didnt really care.

When I go out walking around I start shouting "u know what it is" to random sets and get really good responses. One of the girls was like "black and yellow-black and yellow-black and yellow-black and yellow". I also do Tim's "happy birthday" opener to some sets. One girl was like "how did u know??" and Im like "I just did!" I didnt game after the club. I was again overwhelmed by my own  self-amusement and i didnt intend to do any more game. 

This is fuckin awesome. I also yelled "U know what it is" to a set while i was driving and one girl was like "Wait up!" and went in her car. I guess her friend conviced her not to follow me. Whatever. 

As im driving home I listen to Beowulf's song which totally connects with the moment:
What can I say? I feel glorious. I am what I am and I dont give a shit. I dont also give a shit that i didnt get a lay. Cause im enjoying the process. I feel like im gold. Im the "shit". I dont care what others think. I dont care about how further i should go and how hard it'll be. and Im living in alignment with my values. This is the life worth living.
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