bagua's Blog

bagua
 
So I've been talking about goals lately.
What goal? I have none yet...

Why? Because I'm complacent.

Trying to figure out what my next step was has been a stalling strategy.

However the good news is that I've put wheels in motion that will force me to do something about this.

I've realized that I've not really accepted that females are these sexual creatures.

From being told that it's always the man that are the part thats bad.
And that women are innocent victims of male sexuality.

This was forcefed to me from age 13 to 21 approximately.
Man i dislike the ones that put me trough that.

If I had them here with me now they would know the meaning of pain!

But I guess the only path now is to make a decision about my next move.
I will approach 140 females with an opinion opener!

That was probably the hardest part! Commiting to a cource...
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#1

Watermel

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/10/2010 | Posts: 219

Man, I followed you since few months and it seems like your problem is in not closing, not turning it sexual.

The first girl I fucked after bootcamp cheated on her boyfriend and said me I was a manwhore... This been said, she's a "nice girl" (just imagine a firendly, nice, beautiful girl, that's ther), and gets a lot of male attention.

Tons of girls worry about not being seen as "sluts", which means they want to fuck but they're scared (if they didn't want to fuck you, they would not worry about that). They don't want to deal with consequences. I believe this is why they give you tests, call you pervert, needy, call you a player... in short, they play "games" and "hard to get" in order to make you responsible for what's happening (usually you can feel that they're not really thinking it, they say it to see your reaction - and I imagine it can also be funny for them). This is why a test actually means she likes you - but she wants to know if you can deal with shit.

Yes, girls want to have sex with you, they just need to know that you are okay with it. That you will not make a big deal from it. They want someone who understands what is going on (Alexander calls it "Having a strong reality"), who assumes he is attractive, this is why they often tell you they don't like "immature" guys. What they really mean is that they don't like egoic guys, who try to dominate, who seek attention, who try to impress, in short, who don't "get it" - who don't get that they are enough.

I hope it helps you, it was a real shift in my mindset.

Fucking / kissing / being with girls reinforces this mindset, but the mindset shift happened before my first results. I remember a night when I did one set (3 amazing girls), which I hold for about two hours, I went back home early for logistical reasons (true, and also because I was scared of my own success), but for the first time I was able to genuilly say "Woo" like a litlle happy kid when I was going back home.

Not to boost my confidence.

Not to get in state.

Not because I was happy (but I was).

But because I realized, full positive & negative experience-based proof, I was enough. I don't have to worry about the impression I make on people anymore. Someone can call me the neediest guy in the club, but those others, much more beautiful girls actually like me. Why should I worry? People's reactions just doesn't mean anything. Knowing that, you become more centered, you don't do things to please people but to please yourself. You also realize people, especially girls, like you for you, just because you are a man. You don't try to live up to any standard, you don't try to fit in anymore. You know it is useless, you know it is not what is going to help you. Someone tells you you are wearing the same T-shirt for two days (I assume you don't smell :p ) or any other irrelevant bullshit, and you just smile.

After this mindset you can focus on what you really want, you can enjoy yourself, you can develop your own cool personality without worrying about external feedback.

I hope you see what I am talking about. Follow your bootcamp directives, enjoy her company, and when it's time to go home, take her home.

:)
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#2

Watermel

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/10/2010 | Posts: 219

Oh. I have a song for you.



Just discovered that Natalie Portman was a vegetarian. Great, I am too :D
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#3
bagua

bagua

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/26/2010 | Posts: 355

Thanks for the video!

It was a bit disturbing at first.
I kinda know that girls are that way, but I have a hard time accepting it.

However I will work on the pointers you provided me.
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