Tentative Tour de Force

 
Went out on a date yesterday night with the Chick who also doesn't drink from last Friday.

During the week we texted back and forth. Mostly what I was doing and laid back, join-if-you-want type invitations. 

To get social, I started out at a happy hour. Saw the monster energy drink truck on the way over and frame controlled them into giving me two drinks. Chick shows up in some massive black Lexus hybrid SUV. I had organized a few different parties. It being the Friday before Halloween, some of them wanted to you to dress up. But I don't have a costume yet. I decide it would be good to make it easy, and head out to the beach instead.

Simple banter on the drive there. Maybe a half hour. We hold hands most of the way there just vibe and tell stories. This chick isn't that physically hot, but I really like that she is present – doesn’t ramble about bullshit. I learn she prays two times a day, but not in a religious way. I'm just reading The Relaxation Response; it seems like its right down that lane. It is maybe 9 when we get there. Run down the beach to the ocean in bare feet. I see her eyes pop and kiss her a little. She says something about moving things fast. lol. I see some fires on the beach down a ways, so we drive over. She is nervous about joining a group, thinks that we might be imposing. She's having chode thoughts and approach anxiety. Funny. I indulge here for a while. Call her out on it, saying that we are now officially creeps, lingering on the sidelines. Eventually I just drag her over to the biggest fire and introduce myself. Group is some outdoor adventure party. The invite us in and offer us drinks and smores. Fantastic. She says something about loving that I did that and am so outgoing. ok. haha.

Head back over the road to a restaurant. She lets me drive. They are showing The Shining. I'm not really hungry, but she says she is. Mission: eat as little as possible. Heavy eating leads to bad things. We get ceviche. We are both satisfied. I pay, don’t want to go through the trouble of going Dutch. She thanks me. We head back to my place. It's very relaxed. I like her more than other girls I am seeing now. This can lead to problems. So I focus on my breathing and remind myself that I have hotter (at least from a meat perspective) girls who are down in two minutes: the girls literally next door. Lol. No need to sweat it. In my place she picks up Jeffy's book and starts to read aloud. We talk pickup and I throw on Peter Pan. Haven't seen it yet and we talked about it earlier. She has seen The Pickup Artist with Mystery. So starts asking me about sets. I say I am confused by it all, and don't know or understand most of the techniques. Just be yourself. lol. Snuggle time.

I tell her that I don't want to sleep with her. I really don't. Something tells me that there is a connection here that I would like to build over more time. I do want to have the option of sleeping with her, just not exercise it. Get her compliant/comfortable enough with me. She gives me a back massage, but doesn't want one in return. funny. She won't take off her shirt or pants, even though it is hot. I just want to cuddle naked with her and fall asleep. I can tell as soon as she starts to think of going. After the first time she says she has to go, I tell her to come back and it's on and off for over an hour. I get intellectual. Asking her what she is feeling and rationalizing why she wants to go sleep at home. She says she can be honest (of course haha). Then gives me standard ex-post justifications BS like "I'm tired, but want to drive home first". That shit makes me fall out of state with her, like I don’t like her as much. We kiss some more. She is a better kisser than me. I stopped using my tongue in girls’ mouths a while ago. She tells me to give me hers, and fondles it lightly with her tongue. I also find out that I have been sucking a lot while kissing, creating suction that can cause her lips to sting a bit. But if you are in slow/bedtime/arousing time, this is way better. I get a hard on, and show her. haha. She leaves after 2 am. Didn’t even take off her pants. But I also thought about myself, and am wondering why it was so important to me that she take them off. I shouldn’t really care either way. If she is uncomfortable and doesn’t want to, don’t make it a biggie. She said something about not wanting to be a tease. I should have used that one as well. Saying that I want to feel her naked, but don’t want her to get her hopes up when she is cock-blocked.

Lessons: going rational/talking about what she or you are thinking or why she won't let you escalate is counter-productive. Time is your friend; logic is not! Speaking about things logically actually reduces her compliance. She no longer thinks you are socially savvy, and treats you as such. This makes sense, since being logical is not socially savvy. Ipso facto QED.

We may meet up tonight, house party at her friends on the other side of the bay. We'll see.
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