atmo_7's Blog

Went out last night with a mate who's recently single with the purpose of picking up. First itme I'd gone out with this goal in mind for a while, usually I just go out with my mate/social circle and just get caught up in all that. So it was different going out, just two of us to places where we didn't know anyone.

Anyway, ended up a pretty tough night. At the first venue I tried to get straight into it. Talked to the door chick, just friendly playful banter. Then when I got in, talking to girls at the bar. Not sure if this was the problem, but I was kind of just trying to warm up, but then I conciously thought 'shit I should go in direct'. I think this fucked me up a bit as I wasn't congruent with it. Some chick walked past I was like 'Hey I like your dress, blah blah..'. She was pretty receptive and I clawed her, but then it was weird, I found myself ejecting? What the fuck, not sure why. I was like 'err yeah I have to go now, my mate wants to have a smoke, I'll cya around'. Then I just bailed. Even as I walked away I was just like why the fuck did I do that. Anyway I see her walking around a bit later and give her a hug.. totally unreceptive. Hmm. She had a friend with her that kept pulling her away, cockblocking to the max. Then on the dancefloor same thing happened, totally unreceptive. But she was hanging around near me. Chicks can be a bit weird sometimes...
Bounded to another place.. pretty average again, by then I'd lost state and my mate was drinking hard, getting pretty drunk. Don't think I approached at all here. Then the third place, fuck felt like the biggest chode. Just orbiting around on the dancefloor like a faggot.. anytime I went to say something to a chick she got pulled away by a friend. Really started feeling like a chode then. In my head I remember panicking to find something to salvage my state, shit didn't work.

Overall, an average night in terms of picking up. Good to get out and have a bad night, which I haven't had for a while. Mostly because I've been playing it safe and not approaching. I think I have to connect more to that masculine intent/entitlement/direct action, which I think has been missing lately. Been drinking too much lately, its summer and party season after all. Need to get back into the gym, start meditating again. Fucking hell, a bit pissed off about the night. Weird how a few little things can piss me off like that, but on other nights I get shut down and I don't give a fuck. Oh well, just part of th journey I suppose, I'm trying not to feel a bit down-hearted about it. In times like these its good to remember the basics, from alex: attraction = high value + a full range of emotions, be congruent, you are enough
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