Articuno76's Blog

 
 I won't try and reel people in with a interesting title followed by a long rant so I will explain what this blog is about now: Change in the form of self-improvement (being more positive and confident for example).

I went out last night with a local group of PUA's who have a few years experience.  The interesting thing was that some of the guys tagging along had less field experience than me and had considerably less inner-game/theory behind what they were doing.  In any case, they were very much the image of myself around 4 months ago.  

The leader PUA who was teaching us that night made several observations about me.
1. He told the others to follow my speech as an example of good vocal projection.
This is something I've been working on, so to hear other people recommened me as a model for others who need help in this area was a pleasant surprise.

2. He told me that I had a not-give-a-fuck-attitude in a good way.
What this entails is not being worried about others without due cause.  And being confident.  The reason he made this observation was because I would do several things when I was out at night.  For instance making kissy faces to the bouncers at various venues (they laughed) or walking directly through a group of guys in the middle of the street instead of going around them like most people would.  There is no 'due cause' to be worried about doing these things; only someone with deep emotional issues would take issue with someone talking through where they were standing (unless you do it in a way that is really rude/aggressive).

Recently I've been doing 'expansion' exercises like this, which is where i try my best to 'take up space'.  Walking in straight lines 'through' obstacles is one of the things I do on purpose as a way to build confidence.  I also do other things like taking the back centre seat on the bus and keeping the whole back row to myself.  This doesn't really inconvenience anybody as there are plenty of seats, but it does allow me to impose myself rather than hiding on a corner of the bus.

When I first heard the PUA teacher tell me he thought I was confident I was surprised, and my natural response was that all I was not confident but rather simply attempting confidence boosting execises.  Upon reflection the doing of these execises (and the very fact I would do them), is that not confidence itself in some form?


3. He made the observation that I am someone who 'loves himself'.
This description means someone who is self-amused.  I've been told (and genuinely believed) for the longest time that I'm 'boring' or 'routine' so to be told this was also a pleasant surprise.  Again, over the last 4 months this is one area that I've been working on.

The night I went out was slow going as very loud venues were off limits as they were not deemed good for beginners.  Nonetheless, I became very acquianted with the night life in the town (I've been out of town because of university for years, the last time I was around I wasn't old enough to drink so hardly knew much about the night life).  I also learnt an interesting way of getting through crowds: simply place your hands on people's hips (like you are going to dance with them) and lightly shift them to the side.  It's amazing to me that I can do this, and even more amazing is that people seem to just....be fine with it.  One of my execises that night was to take the path of most resistance when moving around a bar (the most crowded path) so I get the chance to impose myself and move people around me.

Anyway, those are my two pennies.
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