Articuno76's Blog

 
 I talked to a crazy woman on the bus today, she kept saying my accent sounds kind of Americany.  'Americans use bombs to blow up buses, I saw something about it on the TV, but I don't watch the TV anymore cos it doesn't talk to me'....right....still this gave me plenty to talk about that evening.  I asked most sets where they were from or if they were from the Midlands like me, that way they could assess my accent.  I also opened some asian girls so I asked them about gift ideas for Spring Festival (Chinese New Year).  The groups were as follows:

Set 1: 4 Indian girls (from local area)
I asked them about my accent.  Talked about the crazy lady.  We were waiting for ages for drinks so the girls moved to get a better spot at the bar.  The conversation went down very well though.  I didn't notice any attraction happening but it was a genuinely enjoyable exchange for both of us.

Set 2: 2 girls and a guy (All Malaysian)
I asked them about Spring Festival gifts.  We joked about some ideas, then asked about my accent.  It ended in that weird limp way that many sets do...they are fun/pleasant exchanges and then they fizzle out and I walk off after excusing myself...I need to work on that.  

THIS IS A STICKING POINT!  Should I keep going?  I am not sure, it feels like I can...and it feels even like I am expected to...hmm.

Set 3: 3 girls from Hong Kong
I talked to these about Spring Festival ideas. We joked a bit about how to propose to people in Chinese culture.  Then their two friends came up.  I told them me and my friends were going to a certain place and asked for her number.  She turned out to be a tourist who had no phone number (I got the impression it was a legit excuse because she mentioned that earlier on in the conversation...still I think there was something I could have done).

Set 4: 1 girl (her friend left for the bathroom)
I saw my friend open with 'what's 5x6?'  Such an obvious question that most people are taken aback when asked about it.   So I thought, what the hell?! You can open with anything right?  After that we talked about everything.  I tried a little cold reading...thing was I was trying to do a bit of everything without any real focus. Body language also not good (I was leaning in a lot).  She wouldn't give me her hand for a hand shake (this happens a lot!!).  In the end I could have kept going and going but it didn't feel like anything was happening.

I had a short night (only about an hour out), but I feel happy that I did all these sets without feeling anxious, and I did it without alcohol.  On the other hand I feel like I am approaching with such low expectations that I often don't close or am not 'playing to win'.  

In other news this middle-eastern guy brought me a drink...then offered to by me another drink later on...there is something about me that makes me a target for gay middle-eastern men and I'll never quite know what it is.

Also I think 4 sets in one night is not really enough.  You need more than that to really get a feel for which openers work and which ones don't.  
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#1

Articuno76

Member

Join Date: 05/08/2011 | Posts: 41

 Just reading this again I couldn't help but chime in some retrospective advice on the malaysian girl set.  

See me, there is a difference between the quiet expectation (and want) for you to continue when there is a lull in the conversationa nd the quiet you get when someone is expectantly hoping that you will just go away.  And now I think about it after getting a little more experience it strikes me as strange that I never noticed the distinction between the two earlier.  I guess my skills (and skills of perception) are changing after all.
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