The Intellect Manifesto

Anu~
 
I discovered something about myself this Wednesday.

I am shallow. Shallow as a bowl of soup at a French cuisine restaurant. Shallow as a kiddie pool after it's been emptied. I could go on but I've run out of analogies to convey my shallowness.

The night was going awesome. I managed to maintain state from the moment I went out to the moment I went back home.

At about the end of the night, I was on the dancefloor, doing my thang. Just letting loose. In the moment.

I was bringing the party and the girls knew it. I wasn't really doing anything about it because I don't particularly like dance floor game. Girls just seem to tease like crazy. They may make out with you but in the end they leave, having gotten everything they wanted out of you.

Not conducive to pulling.

While I'm dancing this girl starts coming close to me. I peripheralize her and see that she is kinda chubby.

Now I say she is chubby, but the truth is she wasn't half bad, had a pretty face and I have been barren for a long time, so all she would have to do is touch me and I would have shot my load all over her face.

Anyway, so this girl starts dancing close to me, and then SHE opens ME. She's asking me chode questions and starts getting physical with me. I could have taken her out right then and there and had my way with her.

But all I could think was "Man, she's pretty unattractive. I think I'll just keep dancing".

Eventually I just left.

And then it hit me. "What the fuck did I just do? Did I just blow off a decent girl who would have been a (let's admit it) perfectly awesome fuck?"

And that's when I came to realize something. It's not that I was shallow, but that I was deathly afraid of pulling.

This is a major success barrier that I need to hurdle over.

I need to stop discriminating against girls and making up excuses. No matter what the situation, no matter what the actors involved, I need to continuously move towards the pull.

And that is my new goal.
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