a.folchdecardona's Blog

 
The weekend finally arrived. It was time to prove myself that I have some courage in me, that I have the strength in my heart to overcome my fears, go out, cold approach and try to take the interaction to a sexual level.

It was Friday the 24th. It was midnight already, I had done no approaches, and I was waiting for the last commuter train to the suburbs (RER) to go home.

"What is this? Am I going to go home already when the Paris nightlife is just starting? Is this what I am made for? Am I just going to the comfort of my home without pushing the boundaries?"

Those were my thoughts while I was waiting for the train that was about 20 minutes late.

"Is this the result of my training? Of all these years? All this knowledge? Is this the full extent of my power? Will I continue being such a coward?"--My thoughts and emotions.

I had planned to meet a couple of male friends for beers, I only met one of them. My childhood and very good friend from Colombia. He's broke, so I had to treat him for a couple of beers. We talked about science and about women. I've told him about "game" before, but he doesn't really have any interest in it at all... We split, he went home, I went to the RER station.

A few days ago I was reading The Code of the Samurai or the Bushido Shoshinshu of Taira Shiesuke; a book that was written about 400 years ago. When I read the first chapter I found this piece of life altering wisdom:

One who is supposed to be a warrior considers it his foremost concern to keep death in mind at all times, every day and every night, from the morning of New Year's Day through the night of New Year's Eve.

As long as you keep death in mind at all times, you will also fulfill the ways of loyalty and familial duty. You will also avoid myriad evils and calamities, you will be physically sound and healthy, and you will live a long life. What is more, your character will improve and your virtue will grow.


In other words, by keeping death in your mind at all times you will truly be able to live every day as if it was your last.

So I was waiting for the train hasitating about whether I should go home or try some solo game... I've never gone out alone. Then, the thought of death came into my mind.

"What if I die tomorrow? How do I want to live this last night? Whatever I do today, what would it matter if I die tomorrow?". The fire within me was ignited, the fury.

"Let's do this! I have to do this!" Then I left the station and set on my way to a bar. On my way, I'm getting all psyched up... just the decition of doing it, even if alone, got me in state. All of a sudden I'm happy and excited.

However, I know that my friend and wing from Canada, CA, was out that night. I texted him to see what he was up to and he just happened to be close by and also alone. We met up, went to a bar... and I'm on fire. The chode of last Saturday was no where to be seen. I approached, I approached, I approached. I was in state, having fun, dancing, loud... and I was opening.

I did not close. Not a phone number, not a make out, not a one nigth stand. But at least I proved to myself that I can do this, that this is what I want, that I was right at choosing this path.

So there was a three set, a red-headed German girl, a Scottish guy and some other random dude. Both guys looked tough, they were big (I’m not too tall, 1.70 m or 5 feet and 6.929 inches), and they didn't really look very friendly. They were kind of bored, low energy, just standing there drinking beer, barely making any conversation at all. In any case, as I pass I opened by talking to the girl, I don't remember exactly what I said. The Scottish dude gets very alert (I got the feeling that there might be some sort of relationship between him and her)... but I already opened, so it's too late now to eject. He's going to act but before he does, I addressed him too: "hey man, what's up, where are you from? Cheers!" (big friendly smile on my side).

Scottish dude: I'm from Scotland... [Heavy accent, he returned the question]
Me: I'm from Colombia.
Scottish dude and girl: Colombia!!!! [People always reacts very positive when they know I'm Colombian, I still don't get it]
Girl: do you have some Cocaine? [Jokingly, I always get that one too]
Me: [Expression of "oh, not again the same joke"] How much do you want? [With an evil smirk. That's always my come back, it always get the people laughing].

The entire set laughed out loud, the initial tension disappeared. I introduced my wing, and then a fun an animated conversation started. Surely enough, the dude was married to the German chick. The third dude had disappeared, he was a chode the couple had just met that night. After a little while CA and I left the set.

My friend and I had just come out of the dance floor and we were standing up and talking a bit. Just right behind him on one of this tall bar tables, there were two chicks drinking beer. Both American, we could hear them speak. All of a sudden they got up, and the girl closest to my friend turned to him and approached him. She wanted to ask us to keep the table for them while they went out to smoke. But she was a little drunk and quite possibly horny too, because she leaned in and spoke right to his face, their bodies like three inches apart. She is a drop dead gorgeous blonde, hot like hell. And it is on, my friend lit up, he busted out some "cocky and funny" and she herself initiated kino... we kept their tables... my friend and I sat down, leaned back, got comfortable, and waited for them to come back. They came back, the hot blond sat down close to CA, and I was talking to her friend. Unfortunately she was not that hot, just OK. I talked to her and kept her attention away from CA and the hot one. The OK girl and I had an animated conversation about women's rights. For some unexpected reason I got the feeling that this chick was trying hard not to feel attracted to me. Is that weird?

In any case, the girls are meeting another friend, so they left. CA got the hot one's facebook info, she was leaving back to somewhere in a couple of days. This girl was a gem. She was extremely hot, and she was a scientist too, doing high energy physics; my friend does astronomy. That's a rarity, an unbelievable event, perhaps an error in the matrix. There are rarely such kinds of beauties in science. Believe me...

My friend was in shock. He was saying: "what could have I done different? I don't know what I could have done different!" Sweet nightmares he must have had that night.
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