Adronius's Blog

Adronius
 
It's funny how good I feel. I didn't feel like this for years! Well, I'm still very nervous while interacting people, especially women, but at least I'm already interacting, talking to them. Few weeks ago, I wasn't able to talk to strange, unknown women at all. I was shy, negative. After break up with my G/F, when I felt that I'm already good, I was checking other women if they just look at me, if they like me, how I look, etc. But nothing. I was like invisible for them. Nobody noticed me at all. Now, when I'm thinking about it, it can be because I didn't want to be visible, because of my mood - "Do not look at me, do not talk to me, I want to be alone now, because I don't feel good."

I've been thinking about tag "field report". I should use "field experience", it is great experience for me to approach, open, talk to people.

At train station, while I was waiting for train where my brother should come, there was nice girl standing there waiting for train too. I approached, open with question about where the train will come, then we talk for like 10 minutes about where she is traveling, about school, etc. It was great, she was friendly, but then it comes up that she has BF. It doesn't matter for me, I approached, I open, my satisfaction was great.

I was at hairdresser's and there was one beautiful 9 blonde hairdresser girl. She started to wash my hairs, I asked her how many times in day she has to wash somebody's hairs. I was pretty nervous, my heart was beating like jungle drum (like in Emiliana Torrini – Jungle Drum :D), I was thinking about what to say to be funny, to impress and to not look like a idiot. But, then I realized that this is not helpful at all. I chill down and stop thinking about that. Then all of sudden, I asked her if there is some school for hairdressers. She was friendly, we talk about this school, about exams they have there. Then I asked her if she has this work deformation, if she used to look at hairs of people a lot. She said yes, we joke about it for a while. We laughed about that. It was great.

When I'm at bus or anywhere walking at town, people noticed me, especially women! And not just noticed, they seems to be interesed, even when I'm not doing anything. It's amazing! This journey rocks!

Adronius
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