AdmiralAnarchy's Blog

My main sticking points so far have been approach anxiety and forgetting canned material.

Now before I get a bunch of "do the newbie mission" and "just go natural" posts let me clarify myself a little more.  Obviously by my list I am new and still learning so I do have a ways to go.  But I'm not scared of talking to women, and the nights I don't approach compared to when I do are fewer and farther between than they used to be but it still pops up.

I tend to allow the atmosphere of a loud club or bar to get inside my head  and  bring all of my antisocial traits right up the to the surface until the place closes.  However on nights when that isn't a factor, I can borderline own the section of the bar I am at, last night was an example of that for me.

I was a massive antisocial in high school. I was a physical late bloomer physically, emotionally, etc...and allowed my parents divorce and subsequent fallout to turn me inside out and just into one negative, antisocial, self loathing mess.

Now, I am nowhere  near that person anymore. I go out at least twice a week unless I am low on cash, and lately I've just put the drinks on plastic to get out and at least put myself in a place to be successful with women.

However, I still have some of my antisocial tendencies that on some nights cripple my ability to open sets or singles whether I'm attracted or not. Sometimes I'll approach 4s and 5s just to get the social ball rolling...but some nights I can't do that. The approach anxiety would be sticking point number one.

Forgetting canned  material is the other one and although I do ultimately know that I can be a natural, in the Chicago suburbs (where I am from/live) canned material still works and still has a place in the bar and club scene out here. For me, the canned material is a crutch I need to use because for years, up until september, so often I just wouldn't know what to say and when I would just start talking to talk I would end up saying stuff that would  turn women off wayyyy more often than turn them on.  

Now that  I have canned material to say when I'm blank or trying to build rapport after opening and DHVing it has helped me tremendously in my goal of becoming a natural.

But what has been happening lately is the loud as music and somewhat intimidating atmosphere of the  club and bar scene with the 8s, 9s, and 10s are will get the best of me and cause my mind to go blank  like I'm taking a final exam after an all night cram session.

In addition to blanking  on the canned material it also causes my antisocial tendencies to bubble to the surface. 

Any words of wisdom on either or both of these sticking points would be greatly appreciated...

Backlogged field reports will be coming in the near future....
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