I found something that I hadn't fully grasped before - Passion!
It came from conversation with my friends tonight. He was talking about a Sensority Deprivitive Floating Machine (which just sounds awesome in it's own right.). He was so passionate about it, we couldn't help but get interested, even though we had no idea what it was! So we talked and talked, then we got to how my friend had heard of it, he said it was word of mouth, kind of like what we were doing now. That's when I said it,
"When you're talking about something you're so passionate about, it's hard not to be interested!"
I was the one that had said it, but never really realized the truth behind it! How could you run out of things to talk about when you're so passionate about things? You couldn't! That's the transition from giving value in a conversation as opposed to seeking value. Your passion.
If you're saying things for a reaction, or for the sake of contributing, it feels like your words don't have too much weight to them. Saying things with passion gives them value, versus seeking value, such as a responce or such.
This is a term that I personally believe was hindering me for the longest time. I would always use transitional words, "And, like, so, well" so on and so forth. It felt like I'm trying to impress you or run it on. When you become passionate you remove those words, and feel like you're giving out straight gold.
That's what Tyler and Tim were talking about. Tyler talking about just being authentic about the "wall" in the conversation in Blueprint. Tim talked about having nights that you feel everything you say is pure gold. They both lead to being passionate!
By effectively eliminating these words from the use I had originally used them for, and put more emphasis into other aspects of the conversation and life, my social skills or value will rise! I feel it.
Try it yourself, listen to someone who is really passionate about what they do, if you are present in the moment (as you should always be), you will feel pulled into the conversation. If someone isn't passionate about it, you can feel it, and start to drift, because you aren't really pulled in by it.
As an exmaple, this could be why when "chode" you is talking to a girl, it doesn't have much substance, or passion, another guy or something else will come into her RAS, leaving you out of it! This is opposed to lets call it, "State" or "Present" you is so much better! You're in the moment, and passionate about the moment. That's what matters to you. You could use the exact same words as "chode" you would, and be more attractive, just because you're passionate.
A man who doesn't have any passion to him is boring. He drifts through the wind, being attracted to where the interest or value is.
A man with passion is interesting! "What does he like? What gets him so passionate? Why is he so passionate about whatever it is?" This might go through peoples minds as you speak, because you're creating/giving value. Instead of being the drifter, who isn't giving value, you're the one people drift to, in order to give that value.
This can only be done by people who are comfortable with themselves though. People who live off creating that value cannot sustain it, if people just are too far from the concept of it, or any other reason, they will wander. You have to be comfortable with people not wanting your value sometimes. If not you're just seeking them to flock to you as a source of value. It's the whole being comfortable with yourself thing. If someone else is holding the floor, you can't freak out trying to gain your spot back in. You have to be alright with things, accept them as they are, and stay present. Contribute where you do, then when something passionate to you comes along, jump in with what you feel.
That was a mouthful, or a brainful there. Hope to soak it all in, this is all stuff I understood, but never really knew until today. I'm a lot of you reading this will feel the same.
A little side note, breathe deeply, as often as you can, It keeps you grounded into the Meow which in turn can keep you passionate!