abiztyle - a 180ยบ change

Well, today I won't talk a lot about the weekend, specially because I went out only on Saturday, so I will first go through my thoughts lately and then about what happened on this one.

I'm extremely happy with my latest accomplishments, where I'm putting into practice what I learn here at RSDN. Right now that I'm actually DOING things, whereas months ago I was basically reading with few action, the posts for me changed from "oh, this might work" or "oh, this makes sense" to "THIS IS FUCKING REAL, AND IS HAPPENING". So my thoughts from this week are based on the posts from Ozzie about the learning proess and Alex with all his explanation about Strength of Reality:

- Now I SEE that the real growth cannot be faked. It is necessary to go there, fail a lot, get stuck, feel awkward various times, suck it up and keep going. And this will happen until you get comfortable with the situations and learn.

- My reality IS getting stronger through frequency of behaviors. It's been 5 weekends, I've met and made out with 5 different girls, things at work are going great. It is the snowball effect, things are getting bigger and bigger and bigger, that right now, instead of being in a frame of "I should pick up girls" I can't manage 5,6 girls in my life. So I'm pretty much losing some of them, which at the end is not a big deal, since there are more, "better" out there.

- It's clear that you WILL NOT get the 9's and 10's if you don't go through the 7's and 8's (and 5's, 6's for some folks). And the reason is simple: nobody starts playing the big league. You can't expect that you will instantly fuck models if a month ago you were a complete fucked up chode. This relates a lot to the real growth approach. Two years ago I was a complete chode, then I changed to a regular chode, with some success here and there, and now I'm getting regular on approaching and getting girls with certain frequency.

- The ration between male and female doesn't matter in any place. The fact is that most of the guys won't even approach the whole night, rather blaiming the failure on the fact that there were too many guys. More and more I see this happening. Like Tim says, the spectators. Just a few guys at ANY PLACE are willing to take responsibility for what is coming to them.

So, this Saturday I went to a bar that plays rock and roll. Two cover bands were going to play, one from The Doors and the other from AC/DC. Well, after 3 hours there I had a 5% or less rate on songs that I knew. I was with two male friends, one of them told us there was going to be a girl friend of him with her girl friends. When we got there, only his friend had came. Needless to say, he focused all his attention and effort on her, even cutting our talking, having my other friend and I out of the conversation. No big deal, there were more there for us. I started chatting to a chick that seemed to be like 7, 8 years older than me, with an ugly friend. My friend joined. Things were going slow, as my "5% rate on knowing songs" joke had no effect over here, because she really likes rock ahhahaha. Anyway, I was plowing and things were getting to the right path when another friend invited "my girl" to join her group. She called us once, but then didn't call again. She ended up talking to another guy, I saw them singing rock together. No problem, things between us wouldn't work out after all hahahah. But I would certainly miss her wonderful fit legs.

My friend and I rejoined my other friend and the girl. But soon the first one left to do an approach while getting a beer. He, and the beer, stood there, while my other friend was trying to kiss the girl. No deal. At this point, the beer guy was already making out with the girl. I was behind in the score. The girl, my friend trying to pick her up and I changed our spot within the bar to a better one, and that was when the window of opportunity smiled at me.

I saw a cute girl with her friend, even saw a guy trying to game her before, no success. I forgot to mention that my friend and the girl are kinda hyper, so after driking a little bit they get even more hyper and loud. Well, why not use them as a tool to approach? I opened asking the girls if we could cut the alcohol from them and so on, right after that I really don't remember, and it doesn't matter, it was ON and I was IN.

Then it's cake recipe. Equal attention to both of them, the friend likes me, the target likes me, more touch on the target, hand on the targets waist, the friend notices, and then leaves as she knew what was happening. Cool, more chatting, hug, kiss on the cheek, hug, rubbing hand on her arm, tried to kiss once, no deal. I went to get a beer and came back. Five more minutes of talk, hugging and so on, makeout. And then cherish until the end of the show, with a quick stop to emulate a rock band, everyone of my friends playing an instrument =). Live real fun.

Most important is: I saw two window opportunities, acted on both. If you don't kick the ball, how can you expect the goal?!?

Fuck it. Kick the fucking ball. If you miss, at least the crowd (your core) will say "uuuuuuuuuuh", and clap hands acknowledging your tentative. And if you do score, the crowd goes crazy. (Well, this is how my mind is working lately, try it yourself).

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So basically saturday from the previous week I went to a bar, missed to open two chicks that were on the line wth us, then they stood by mine and my friends side, like baiting us to open, we did nothing, a male friend of her saw her and brought them - she and her friend - to his group, with two more chodes. The guy who knew her did well and made out with her friend, but the girls chose none of the chodes. She was getting sleepy, I had to do something. I came over her shoulder:

- Hey, don't lean on the pillar, you're gonna sleep
- I'm sleepy already! - and laughed

For the first time in my life I see a chode blocking me. One of the guys said something in her ear and just switched positions with her, to block my way. No biggie, I was still able to flirt from behind. Then she came to my side again, but for my surprise, the chode just grabbed by the arm and pulled her back aahhahahaha. Well, she got tired and just went home unhappy right after this event. And I learned a lesson: you think, you do! That would have avoided her having such a sleepy night, that's for sure.

This friday I went to a halloween party, was able to "almost" close one (she kept turning her face on me), but it was good to build momentum, then started chatting with - IMO and others' also - the cuttest chick in the party, but she saw me speding ammo on the other one, which didn't help much. It was still interesting to see her investing a little bit, but then getting rational like thinking "I'm the second choice". Then I ended up talking to a 18 year-old model, who was very friendly and warm. I didn't score any goals but I was very happy for being unstifled and just having fun, which drawn a lot of attention to myself, being you just fucking works out!!!

On saturday went to another venue, a female friend that was with us merged our group with another group with girls only, and from there I did my job. A little chat, escalation, 15 minutes and makeout. Great night.

Yesterday I went to another bar, saw a cute girl starring at me, Then I saw her walking towards the exit, made a facial expression of disappointment to her, went after her, saw her in the line to pay with her friends (one of them which I thought was gonna cockblock), whispered for her to go back to the bathroom. She understood the message, came back, I met her on the way, 10 minutes of chatting and deal closed, makeout.

So, in the last 4 weekends I met 7 different girls, made out with 4. Most important, I reinforced some things:

1 - The universe DOES respect those who have attitude. MAN IT UP. Staying there like a champion doesn't make you a champion AT ALL. I saw many "cool" dudes the last 4 weeks, who after 4 hours, would still be there "looking cool". To go there, do whatever you want to do, open, chat, meet new people, this is what being cool is really about.

2 - Being involved with a lot of different girls, along with going out frequently, has helped me a lot to be unstifled and more unapologetic. Right now I really don't give a shit to any particular outcome, because I KNOW there are plenty of women out there, plus lesson 3 below...

3 - When your LIFE is aligned, I mean, you take care of your work, of your body, your health, women start to be a consequence. This is real. It feels like when you have your life in hand, there is this inner glow that people can see and end up reacting to. Last week and just went to swimming classes one day, did nothing in the others. This week I will get back to practice, as this and next month I have running races (10km and 18km).

So, now I'm out of money so will have to plan my next weekend better, I can't spend much. But so far things are just going great!

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Here we go. Just like everything that is overplanned, nothing that I wrote as expectation for this week happened. But I was able to overcome this little "issue", plus practice new things.

Things started on Sunday, when after working during the day and partipating in phone calls I went to work - IN THE OFFICE - from 8pm to 11pm.

A friend called me because he was with is cousin, a male friend, some chicks and needed 1 more guy to complete the numbers. I was fucking tired, but I didn't let it affect me. A Red Bull in hand and everything should be fine. After wandering around to find a good place to go, we ended up going to my friend's place, his relatives were all out. One of the chicks really chose me, I believe she decided that because of my dance with a pillar in front of one of the venues we stopped by.

Well, things progressed and soon we were making out. Almost no words, all physical, but then an issue. Do you know when a girl is the kind of girl (not professional, though), but tries to play the role of the castle princess? This was the case. On my first kiss on her neck, she left to another room saying I was depraved (not exactly that harsh). OK, she was trying to set the frame. I was just unapologetic. She ended up coming to me again and saying "I want you". We got back to work. But then I fucked up by spilling some beer on her, laughed a lot of it, she got mad for some minutes but then it was all cool again. I was really not giving a shit, mainly because I knew she was naughty, also cuz she was around 6.5 in my scale, so no big deal at all. Along with that, I was told she always is the one complaining about things, whereas I'm placing myself in the opposite direction. All of a sudden, she was almost sleeping, I tried one more atempt and she left. Well, fuck it, I was not that patient at the moment to go step by step, again, because of the reasons mentioned above. Went home and slept very good.

On Thursday, the b-day was awesome, the guys are really great to go out with, but just one of the girs mentioned in the last post was there. Logistics went against me, she sat beside a close friend of mine, and he slowly took that ground for him, and ended making out with her (out of our eyes). Let's get drunk, then! And we did that perfectly! We just got craaaaaaaaazy, I woke up late for work, but my bless is that I don't have hangover, hence I was OK to work the following day.

Saturday - The same friend from last Sunday told me he had a ticket for a great show , he bought it for an ex-girlfriend he broke up with but still loves (yes, kinda chode, I'm trying to help him out but it's been hard). Again, for a second I though "no", but the need to have something to write here is really fuelling me! When we were there, we got into the wrong line. On our way to the right one, two chicks stopped us:
- Hey, wanna buy two tickets?
- Why, you girls gave up?
- Yes, we're going to another place...
- Sure, let me call my friend

I called my friend, but she decided not to go anymore.
- She is not coming anymore...
- Oh, we're not gonna sell this thing...
- I will help you out... - at this moment, I turned my back to them and started whistling like crazy making nonsense gestures to nobody. Turned around to them:
- Just kidding! OK, wish you guys luck, cya! and left for the line again

The show was great, I was 80% unstifled I'd say, because I was not able to go straight to the girls but we were getting a good amount of attention, because I was screaming crazy stuff, giving a lot of value to the group I was with, helping everybody to have a good time. A really hot girl was with her friends orbiting around us, but the chode here was not able to open. The same happened with another chick who checked me out a couple of times. I got kinda mad but no big deal.

When there was around 30 minutes for the show to finish, someone touches my back:
- Hey, do you wanna buy some tickets? - Yes, the chicks from outside hahahaha
- Hey! Sure, how much are they?
I made a great job managing the attention of them both, showing my intent to the one I wanted, and controlling the other, I got very happy with that. The show finished, and I said goodbye, but did not aimed for the close. Went back to the group I was with, grabbed my friend to leave. When we are leaving, I see the chick by herself on the phone, her friend was not there. I thought "hey, the universe rarely gives us a second chance..."

I went there, started yelling to her friend over the phone some random stuff, and just fucking closed. Just like I thought, that was what she was waiting for. We stood there for 10 minutes, then her friend's dad came to pick them up (she is 19, her friend 20). We parted ways. The night was over and I had to run with my running team in the morning. I was able to woke up and run =). Mission accomplished, a great week.

This week I really challenged myself to mantain focus, not to let the laziness take over. AWESOME. NEXT WEEK PROMISES. IT ALWAYS DO!

This time, no plans for next week. Let's make them in a real-time fashion! :-P

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Well, I just noticed that I'm not going out at all (I could write 100 reasons here but at the end they are just shitty stuff)

Starting tomorrow, I will be writing something here every week. Whatever happens, I'll post here. BUT....for me to write stuff here, things must be flowing and happening. ACTION. That's what is missing.

Being in relationships from January to June made me rusty on working out things from scratch. Cherishing is always something to beware.

To start things off: Week 41 (this week)

Last Saturday I did some volunteering with the people from work, and was able to get closer to one of the girls. She gave me a ride, and I ended up leaving my shades in her carm which helped to build a little more connection throughout the week. It's on.

It was b-day of another girl from the same department of the one above, I was able to compliment her on our internal messenger and build some rapport. Passed by her in the hallway and she was all friendly like we known each other for a while. It's on.

Next thursday, there will be a b-day celebration, and all the chicks (forgot to mention they are both hot) will be there (and others). Good opportunity to score as looks like I'm moving next year (same company, different business). Gotta enjoy my possible last months - for a while - here where I leave.

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Well, I promised I would keep this blog as a tracking of my way to success, and this involves good and bad moments. Right now is moment to write a bad one.

Yesterday I woke up early, went to the gym (40km away from my city), came back home and then went to a friend's party. He is 22, his girlfriend is pregnant and he is marrying next week (pretty said for him, but things happen as they should).

Well, there I was at the party, just a few girls, many chodes (and right now I think, myself included), classmates from high shool, everything was going good. Some girls were on the other side of the place where we wer, dancing with the chodes. I did wrong because as I didn't get any EC (just small bits, but nothing solid) I thought nothing was going on. OK. I stood there, talking to my friends, and then it got late, th girls went home. The host of the party went to drive the girls home (his father has a van). When we came back, he said to me: "you made a legion of fans, huh?" I asked "Why?". And he replied: "I just drove the girls home, and they were all asking who the guy with blue eyes was...". I got the lesson. You see a girls. You feel OK. You go and DO IT. I wanted to be on safe ground, and that's exactly the reason why I ended up alone yesterday. If I want to get really good, if I want to improve, I have to step up even when there's no hint of success at all. Go and just do it.

To end the night even worse, I had a place to go, where a girl I used to date was going to be (later I was told that I was the one suppoed to give her and her friend a ride, lol). I got home so tired from the day that I slept, and woke up just this morning. Shit.

That's it, two important lessons (that I've read before, but haven't felt for real) for the weekend: MAN THE FUCK UP, and take all opportunities to improve.

Let's see what this week has planned for me. SKO!
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I've never noticed I had a blog for myself in here! That I could write freely any kind of shit . Well, I will start then.
I just though about something: this morning I was in a running event, 5 and 10km (I run 10), and there was about 8,000 people participating. I thought to myself: how many people know about this whole rsd thing? About self actualization, about being, not doing, how many? I probably wouldn't fill out one hand if I asked every single person.

The reason why I'm putting this is because I thought, then: since I had this opportunity, I was brought here by my own mind telling me I could be more, I could achieve more, I CANNOT JUST LET IT GO AND NOT MAKE IT HAPPEN. Even if I die trying, I can never leave this behind anymore! I mean, even if I give up, every night when I'd put my had on the pillow I'd have this memories ("you had the chance, but you did nothing..."). And this would be, for sure, real failure.

Just bought Jeffy's book. $120 bucks invested in a new commitment: I will make this happen for real. Tired of average. Tired of inconsistency. Tired of doing, not being. Tired of mid-success, mid-risk, mid-mind. Time to be BIG.

If don't go 'til the end right now, not only my poket will feel hurt. I will have betrayed the most important person in my life. MYSELF.

Success is not anymore an option. IT IS A MISSION.

Here we go. From now on, on a regular basis, highlights of how things are going. Don't think a lot of people will read, but I will refer back to it often. This is something specially for me to remind that I cannot fail my own words and thoughts.

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